So this is my first blog ever and if I'm being honest, it's already so stressful.
Let's start by introducing ourselves. I'm Lawal Olaitan also known as Petroava.
You can introduce yourselves to me in the comment section. I'm a business woman, I own a makeup line called Petroavabeauty. You can check out my business page later @petroavabeauty on Instagram. Like i said it's my first time blogging and I'm really not sure how this is going to go, I’m hoping it goes well.
I’m a blog scientist by the mind and a passionate blogger by heart (at least that's what I would like to think).
I'll encourage people to visit my blog from time to time cause we're going to be treating different topics like self improvement, how to travel on a budget, how to be a real and true friend, helping small businesses get customers, the art of getting what you want and many more fun and exciting topics. Different topics would be published twice a week.
We'll be having a chat about Common mistakes people make when relating to the opposite sex today.
Personally, I've noticed people make so many mistakes when relating to the opposite sex, so basically we'll be talking about four common mistakes people make when relating to the opposite sex.
See Also: Tips for Building a Healthy Relationship
Mistake 1- We misinterpret the attention of the opposite sex.
As an outgrowth of the frustration and desperation sometimes
experienced when we want to be married, many singles overreact to any
attention from someone of the opposite sex, especially if that someone
is attractive to them. If a man looks at us twice, we women can read all
kinds of things into it. If a woman happens to sit by a man at a social
function, he thinks she's sending him come-ons.
This misinterpretation of attentions is one of the major reasons its
difficult for a single man and woman to have a platonic relationship.
Both are on their guard, worried about signals, instead of allowing that
two people can actually have a friendly conversation and enjoy each
others company without a romantic attraction.
I also observe too often that many singles enjoy sending signals and then disowning them. After all, it's an ego
trip to think that one or two people are on your string, hoping you'll
come their way sooner or later, even if you're not attracted to them.
They disguise their maneuvers (perhaps even to themselves) by telling
everyone, we're just friends. They even say that to the other person
right up front, laying the groundwork for a quick exit when necessary,
and then proceed to give attentions and signals that are truly
misleading. Anyone would misinterpret them. And they break not a few
hearts in the process of feeding their egos.
Mistake 2- We put too much in a relationship and hang on too long.
Do yourself a favor: Admit you have an emotional dependency you're
calling love or even admit that you really love the person if you think
you do but acknowledge that its a wrong relationship and get out. How do you get out? By taking drastic steps.
If you're in a relationship and you're being treated with disrespect,
thoughtlessness, or unkindness, that's a good sign you've hung on too long
and put up with too much. If you're hoping he or she will change, you
don't know too much about human nature. The one thing that might make a
person like this change is having to live with the consequences of his
or her behavior namely, losing the relationship. As long as he or she
can get by with treating you shabbily, there's not likely to be much
change in behavior.
If you're not happy with the treatment you're receiving from a person
before you marry, you can be sure the treatment you would get after
marriage would be much more of the same and worse.
See Also: Male Guide To Female Communication
Mistake 3- We carry our list of requirements for a relationship with us and judge others too quickly and selfishly.
I used to have a list of the things I wanted in a man. The list was
divided into Essential and Nonessential. Now, that's not an altogether
bad idea.
My Essential list now has one thing on it: Must be someone who would
enhance my walk with God and allow us to have a more effective ministry
together than we have separately.
Many singles, however, seem to have a long list of requirements for
their potential date or mate, and they've gotten a bit carried away with
it, probably as a reaction to the many failed marriages around us. It's
as though they're checking you out, making sure you meet their needs.
They approach this area of their lives as they might approach buying a
car: What features do you have and what are the benefits of those
features to me?
Having certain important guidelines in mind as we meet and date
people is helpful in keeping us from making totally emotional decisions.
But checking people out for selfish reasons is going too far.
Mistake 4: We think that anything is better than being alone.
While its true that we have basic needs for companionship, its not
true that loneliness is the worst condition in the whole world. Note that
I said loneliness, not loneliness. There's a big difference, you know.
Most people fear loneliness because to them it represents loneliness.
They haven't learned to fill their time so that loneliness is valuable and
refreshing for them. I have learned to love my loneliness, but it has
not always been that way. It has come as I've learned to enjoy the
presence of God and stopped equating loneliness with loneliness.
Loneliness is a feeling, an attitude. We don't get through this life
without experiencing it to some degree. But to settle for anything as a
substitute for loneliness is a big mistake. There are worse things than
loneliness, and by Gods grace we do not have to be overcome and defeated
by loneliness. He can take our loneliness and turn it into beautiful,
fruitful, productive time with Him.
Recognize that being alone doesn't mean you're a social misfit. Don't
buy into the lies of our enemy, who wants you to feel desperate. When we
feel desperate, we act in irrational and unprincipled ways. When we
feel an overpowering need to have someone near, we'll settle for
anything.